Book #4 Autism Awareness Introduction (September 2017)

Some time ago, autism spectrum disorders wasn’t a thing parents, caregivers, doctors or teachers talked about. Today, autism diagnoses are so prevalent, how can we not have questions or discuss it. Yet there is still much we do not know about autism, as the spectrum is wide. Ranging from low functioning to high functioning autism. Where a diagnosis is often either hard to get or parents don’t even know their children have it.

Awareness, education and support are the keys to fighting the symptoms of autism; as there is no “cure”. It’s more of a way of life; that people learn to cope with. Where it’s no different than any other mental condition or neurological disorder. Yet living with autism, is just like living as a neurotypical person.

Thus, a diagnosis is just what it is; a diagnosis. It does not define a person or determine who they are or what they will be. More like a different way to see, feel and perceive the world. So we all have a choice when it comes to anything in life and autism is no different. We can either fight and embrace autism or ignore and hate it. What will you choose to do?

 

 

 

 

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Do Vaccines Cause Autism or We Predisposed?

Autism and vaccinations has been a much-debated topic throughout the years. As a mom of four, with three children on the autism spectrum. (10,8,4); I have mixed feelings. I believe vaccinations worsened my daughter’s autism. She was developing typically then after having many vaccinations; she dramatically regressed. Regressive autism could be the case, but it’s hard to narrow it down. She was delayed in all areas of development and she struggled to thrive. Her immune system became weak and she was always sick.

My twin boys on the other hand, only one has autism. Both were on same vaccination schedule, yet we were always behind with shots. So, in this case, vaccinations had no effect on his autism. Otherwise his twin brother would have it too. But then again, who knows!

Yet I knew from birth one twin was on the spectrum, so there points to the womb and brain development in pregnancy. But he didn’t have as many vaccines like my daughter did. So who really knows! Not to mention the fact they both have the same diagnoses; PPD-NOS and global developmental delay (persuasive developmental disorder, none other specified). Thus as we see, it’s hard to narrow down the causes of autism or to find that “missing puzzle piece”.

Therefore, despite the recent findings that vaccines don’t cause autism; I feel more research needs to be done as every child and case is different. But on the other hand, I don’t believe vaccines cause autism, but I believe they can trigger it and/or worsen this neurological condition. Maybe it’s specific vaccines that need some investigation. But I believe if you are genetically predisposed to have autism, because it runs in your family; a vaccine or anything foreign to the body can trigger a reaction and/or mutation in the form of autism. Just like with any other disease or condition that is specific to our unique gene compositions. If it’s in our genes, there’s always a chance we can get it. Regardless of taking vaccines.

So, when it comes to parents vaccinating their children; it’s a personal choice for me. A parent must do what’s best for their child. Only they can decide that. Therefore, I am not against a mom who chooses to not vaccinate her kids. Her kids, her choice. Just respect my decision to vaccinate mine.

Hence, I am a mom that is for vaccinations as there is just too many diseases in this world. I feel it’s my job to protect them from illnesses and vaccines do it for a lifetime. I’ve weighed the risks and despite the chances of vaccines causing or worsening autism; they serve great purposes. Vaccines save lives. It protects our children forever.

Every Super Woman Needs a Break

Every “superwoman” needs a break. She just can’t be it all and do it all.  Her mind, body and soul is telling her something. But she keeps ignoring herself to take care of others and to keep grinding. After all life is “no walk in the park “. No matter what the fakes and wannabes say.  Life is hard and if you don’t give it your all, you will fail or play catch up forever.
But if we as nurturers, mommies, health professionals and leaders don’t take a much needed break; we will collapse or fall apart.  Where some of us can pick up the pieces and come back stronger than ever.  While the rest never “survive” the setback; because not every superwoman knows when to stop. I almost didnt know when to stop;  but looking at my 4 beautiful  children I am reminded of who I am. That  I don’t want to leave them motherless. So I decided to focus on ME for a change. This super woman took a much needed break to take care of herself mentally, physically and emotionally. For the grind will always be there. Those that need me, I am no good to them functioning at 25%. So I rested my mind, body and soul; finding something no one can take from me; inner peace.  

Women With Attitude

Women with attitude aren’t “mouthy” or considered “bitches”; just because they have a voice. Or because they have something to say that others can’t face or handle. Women with attitude are the ones who deserve the most respect; they have something to say and aren’t afraid to express themselves. That’s takes heart and guts because they speak even if others might not agree. They still hold their heads high and voices strong. Women with attitude are leaders who speak their mind even if people dont like them after they say what they gotta say.
They are mothers, teachers, health care professionals and every day women who choose to not stay silent, but speak up. Women with attitude are just mistaken for having big mouths while men can say whatever they want and it’s considered intelligent. We as women have brains we choose to use, not waste away. If more women spoke up, there would be less “cattiness” and more women unity.

Nine times out of ten, women agree with one another but are afraid to have a voice because they want to be liked. So ladies keep speaking your minds; others opinions of you don’t matter. And if you feel the need to impress another female to be their “friend”; she is not worth much nor is she worth your time. Be yourself, have a voice with attitude. Women with attitude are winning these days because they will not apologize for loving themselves to the fullest.

Book # 4 Autism Awareness by Author Nicole A. Walker

Inspired by my first non profit organization A.I.R (Autism is Real) Foundation; Autism Awareness will be my 4th book coming out September 22 2017. A book filled with information about various topics; answers to your most important questions. Topics such as autism and sleep, autism and adhd, autism and sexuality, etc. Its a preamble to my long awaited book #5 Raising Autism: A Parents Guide with a new release date of December 22, 2017.

5 Things Childless Women Shouldn’t Say to Mothers

1. A woman without kids should never judge a mother; for who she is or what she does as a parent to provide for her children. She’s never been in her “shoes”; nor can she “just put them on”. Either understand or mind your business.
2. Women with no kids have no business, judging women with kids. No matter how many kids she babysits or takes care of; being a mom is so much more than that. Its a 24/7 job; you have no idea what she goes through behind “closed doors”.
3. Childless women should never tell a women how to raise or discipline their children. Being a mother is one of the hardest jobs in the world; so she won’t be perfect. But she has her children’s best interest at heart all the time. They came from her body; there will always be a biological connection.
4. Respect real moms for the sacrifices they have to make and the ones you don’t. Give credit where its due. Motherhood is the most underpaid and underappreciated job ; in which many cant handle. Even if they say they can; they gotta be a mom to understand the real deal.
5. Childless women should mind their business when its comes to motherhood; unless she has carried and birthed a child. She has no idea what a mom has went through just to bring her children into this world. Respect her strength and willingness to sacrifice her own life to have babies.

So childless women, the next time you see a mom; whether she has 1 or 5 kids; salute her. Her grind is no different than yours; respect her hustle. She is raising kings and queens that will take care of you one day.

 

 

Jealous Women Need Self Work

When a woman is consumed with jealous internally or on the inside; she is ugly. Her mind, body and soul needs some serious work. Jealousy is truly an ugly trait to possess in a woman. Regardless of how pretty she looks on the outside. She can have beautiful hair, gorgeous body and dress like a model. But if she is internally jealous, she is externally ugly too. Because nine times out of ten, that jealous woman is selfish, doesn’t help others and isn’t too “pretty” to be around.

Jealous women need inner work or need to learn self love. Because a woman that loves herself doesn’t care what the next woman is doing, look like or wearing. Real women know there is no such thing as competition.  We love ourselves for who we are,  not who we want to be or wish we could be. So ladies love ourselves first,  we will get more with “sugar” than  with “salt”.

Men are Simple Creatures

Men aren’t that complicated; women tend to make things more difficult than we think. They really don’t want much; consistency, simplicity and honesty is the biggest keys in any relationship. Especially for men; for they are brains are not built like a woman’s. We as women like to do it all and be it all. Sometimes doing too much for our men and then they take us for granted.

Men are simple creatures who really don’t expect much. So when we put out too much into a relationship; its deemed weak or that we have a lack of self of esteem. The last thing we want men to think about us. We are already fighting double standards and still working hard to be considered equal to men in society.

The problem is sometimes we as women try too hard to impress them; when we really don’t have to.  And if we feel the need to do that,  maybe they aren’t for us. Or we need to reevaluate who we are on the inside. As no man is worth more than our self worth. Men are simple creatures who really want simple things. Well depending on the man we are dealing with. But all in all; they are all pretty much the same when they think about relationships; especially marriage. No man wants a woman to have to try so hard; than she isn’t being her true self. And no woman wants a man that demands so much; because than he is usually lazy, just not that into you or a narcissist.

Men are simple creatures, so lets keep it simple ladies and just be ourselves. If that isn’t good enough, obviously he isn’t either. Keep it pushing, they are “plenty fish in the sea”.

Choosing to be Parents before Partners

The truth is when we have children; life changes dramatically in many ways. Life just isn’t about us anymore. Whether we have one or four children; we as parents must “move” accordingly. Thus the more children we have; the more “weight” to carry. The younger they are, the less time we have as partners and the more time we spend as parents.  Just as when you have young and preteen kids.

Thus partnership often comes somewhere 5th on our list of things to do. After work, college, business, family obligations, etc. So we spend majority of our time in “parent mode” until they are grown and on their own. If we don’t have special needs children, that is. But to be great, not perfect parents its important we work as a team. One that cannot be divided by our personal feelings for one another; nor can be manipulated to their advantage. We must push aside our personal feelings that we may have for one another; to parent our children. Sacrificing our own needs and wants so they can live right. For the children should always come first; regardless of one’s relationship status, home location or economic status. As children are children after all; they see no titles and they just want to be loved.

Yet we must also teach our children what love and family is all about; through being the best partners we can be. For the relationship we have with our partners; in front of our children; is how they will love others. They are sponges and will “absorb” and “spill out us or what we do and say”. So we must show them how to have healthy relationships built on self love, trust, respect and loyalty. How to distinguish the “fakes” from the “reals” in their life by the people we associate ourselves with.Which is what we do, when we put our children first. We show them how to handle business and what is really important in life; they are. Because when we choose to be partners before parents; we are choosing to love our children the best way we know how; not the most perfect way. There’s a big difference. For love is love as long as its real.

Asperger’s Syndrome in Adults

Asperger’s Syndrome (AS) is also called high functioning autism (HFA); where the signs aren’t visible to the “naked eye”. Its an autism spectrum disorder just like persuasive developmental disorder-none other specified (PDD-NOS) ; so it will receive the same diagnosis. But the symptoms, level of functioning and the degree in which they fall on the autism spectrum will vary.

Many adults with Asperger’s Syndrome are often children who were misdiagnosed or considered ” bad children”. As adults with this form of autism, don’t “look like they have it”; but they do. They just don’t appear “disabled” or struggling; but they are. Where they are struggling to maintain friendships and communicate with others. But they appear normal which they are but on the inside they are “dying” to understand who they are and why they do the things they do. Awareness,  education and self love is where the understanding begins and ends.

Some signs to look out for (not all):

1. Lack of empathy or not having the ability to empathize or understand what another is going through.

2. Communication difficulties, making friends with younger people as opposed to those their age.

3. Having limited interests or hobbies; taking interest or liking just one or few topics in life.